it pours

I brought Olivia for her 1yr check-up this morning. We had the worst nurse ever - she rivals Nurse Ratched. She asked me lay Olivia down on the table so she could measure her head. I warned her that she hates her head touched and has an independent mind lately. I offered to hold her in my arms upright and she could sneak the measurement of her head just like the other nurses in the office have done in the past. She refused and instructed me to lay her down on the table. Of course, Olivia freaked out - shaking her head back and forth and waving her hands. I tried holding her still the best I could only to hear the nurse say "Um, Mom - could you do something to hold her still? I can't do everything! I'm not Supernurse!" Clearly. She finally got her head measurement and did a quick length measurement but it was shotty at best. She didn't stretch her heals or try to get her body in a straight line. Olivia was 28in long by her measurements. We then go into the hallway to get her weight. The nurse attempted to zero the scale but didn't place the pad on the scale first. I had to ask her to zero the scale again before placing Olivia on it. Olivia weighed 18 lbs even. We go back to the room to wait for the pediatrician where we waited for at least 15mins. When the pediatrician came in she immediately got to work. She first addressed Olivia's skin tone noting its orange-yellow appearance. It has been this color long before she started eating carrots, sweet potatoes, and squash. The pediatrician said to watch the whites of her eyes for any yellow coloring since this could indicate a liver problem. She then shows me the weight and height charts and points to the dots slightly off the chart that represent where Olivia stands. She said her weight was acceptable since babies tend to lose or plateau when they become more active but she was concerned with the fact that her height had declined slightly. She suggested that Olivia might have a thyroid or growth hormone issue going on that would explain her slow growth. I couldn't believe it! What else could go wrong in one appointment? The pediatrician suggested that we wait three months until her next appointment and recheck her height. If it's still an issue we'd get her thyroid and growth hormone checked with a blood test. Because we are going through this with Jake, I requested that we have the blood test done before leaving the office. Olivia got three shots which left welts and blood stains on her clothes. We then headed down to the lab to get her blood drawn. My poor girl was stuck four times before we left the building.

When we finally got home I made her a bottle and cuddled with her on the couch until she fell asleep on my chest. She was so peaceful in my arms after such a stressful morning. I placed my lips on her forehead for a minute breathing in her sweet smell. For these short moments my baby was safe with me.

when it rains

I went into Jake's room this afternoon to tell him that rest time was over and found him passed out. Never a good sign. Sure enough, when my little man emerged from his room his face was pale and he was whining about his belly and his head. Little bugger is sick. It figures! I had class tonight, and for the next 24hrs I'll have my nose in my microbiology book studying for an exam tomorrow night. As I was leaving for class tonight, Jake asked me to stay home and sit with him. Practically broke my heart. I told him that I had to go to class but would check on him when I got home. I felt so guilty for leaving him. I shouldn't be going to school right now, I should be home with my babies. I should be reading them bedtime stories and kissing them goodnight. When I got to class I explained to my professor that I had a sick child at home and asked if I could be excused from lecture after our quiz. He agreed and I was able to make it home just as Jake was going to bed. I read a couple of chapters of Jigsaw Jones and kissed his forehead. Thankfully, his fever is coming down with the help of some Motrin. I just hope his belly feels better tomorrow.

practice doesn't make perfect

I take my camera out at least once a day. After annoying my children with the lens in their face, I quickly plug my camera into my computer to see what I've done. Each day it's the same pictures, different outfits, different problems. I get frustrated and put the camera away vowing never to touch it again. Then I look at pictures taken by Michelle, Girl, and Krysten whose talents inspire me and frustrate me all at the same time. I get lost in their work and think that if I work hard, I too, will be able to call photography a talent of mine. Not so. I pick up the camera and start taking more pictures hoping to create something worth showing off. No such luck. Although I haven't given up yet, part of me wonders when I'll realize that I'll never be good enough. I laugh because we went out and bought a decent camera, a few lenses, and the accessories, to take better, higher quality pictures. I'm frustrated. I'm sitting here treading water in the ocean of photography and while I'm not exactly sinking, I'm not swimming either. I hope that I'm half as good as Michelle, Girl, and Krysten one day. They are truly amazing. While I aspire to be amazing someday, I'd settle for 'average' in a flash.

zoo reviews: Little Tikes Crashing Waves Waterslide

(photo from Walmart.com)

I bought this for Olivia's birthday party since it was 96* and we had a TON of kids coming. My parents haven't opened their pool yet so we needed a way to keep the kids cool. I ventured out to ToysRus but they didn't have anything in the same price range that Jacob could be independent on. By "independent" I mean utilize it the same way other children his age would rather than relying on someone to get him around the contraption. I wanted him to feel "free" to play and have fun with the other kids. Anyway - I didn't see anything at ToysRus so I stopped at Walmart on my way home to find this slide by Little Tikes.

Even though Chris wasn't happy with the price tag, he was thrilled with it once he saw how easy it was to set up and take down. He also apologized for giving me a hard time about it once he realized how miserable all the kids would have been without it. Miserable kids = miserable adults.

After everyone left, Chris and I got into our bathing suits and played in the water with Jake and Madison. We were able to go down the slide too even though the box says it's for ages 5-10. My first thought was "Umm...could you be more specific? Are we talking an American 10yr old or a Chinese 10yr old - because there is a difference!" Once we opened it up we pulled out the directions which state that the slide will hold up to 350lbs at any given moment. We had a blast!!

Zoo Review - 5 Bananas

Retails for $349 - $399 at Walmart
Set Up: 3 minutes or less
Pick Up: Once dried, 10 minutes to fold up and store
Pros: Parents can play with kids if under the weight limit, hours of fun, the pool is shallow enough for our 1yr old to stand it, Easy to use, convenient carry bag for storage and transporting
Cons: Price, because of constant water feed for slide and water gun - water in the pool doesn't warm up much.
Overall: We'll be using it a lot this summer when we can't get to the beach or when we have playdates. We love it!!!!

On a side note: Don't try to pick the box up by yourself! I have plenty of bruises to show for my many failed attempts to get the box in my cart. Our Walmart isn't known for their helpful employees.

one beautiful year!

One year ago I held you in my arms and cried over your beauty. I couldn't believe you were all mine. When the nurse had to take you back to the nursery to take your vital signs and give you your first bath, I sat there counting the minutes that passed while you were gone. When I couldn't take it anymore, I sent Daddy to get you and bring you back to me. Being the best Daddy ever, he did just that. He placed you back in my arms where you stayed until your many visitors arrived.

When we brought you home, you were still napping in your seat. You had fallen asleep in the five minutes it takes to get from the hospital to the house. You came into the house peaceful, quiet, and calm and that's how it has been ever since (for the most part).

It has been an amazing year and I can't imagine my life without you. So, Happy 1st Birthday my little "Livi Bug"! I love you sweet baby girl - more than I could ever express in words.

the other woman

Chris plays xbox pretty regularly. I've never really minded as long as it doesn't interfere with things that need to be done. In order for him to play his favorite game (GTA), the kids have to be in bed AND asleep. I've joked that once the kids go to bed, I come second to the xbox. That was a joke until I got shhhh'd tonight so he could hear what his GTA girlfriend was saying!

I'm planning a bonfire - I'm curious to see how fast the xbox will burn.