Houdini Lives

We child proofed our house or at least we thought we did. Knob locks, drawer locks, gates, and anchors - we’ve got it all. Unfortunately, these locks are more parent proof than Madison proof.

A while back, our little girl decided to pull her dresser drawers out to form a staircase to the top. Sadly, this happened just shy of Chris getting the dresser anchored to the wall. This ended with a loud crash, screaming, and Madison found crouching beneath her fallen dresser which was caught by her bed creating a lean-to. Scared me half to death.

About a week ago, she got out of her room, crawled under the gate in mouse-like fashion, and escorted herself downstairs for some unsupervised play time.

A few days ago, she figured out how to get into her closet where we hang her dressy clothes and store a box or two of old clothes. I walked into her room to get her ready for the day to find her in layer after layer of small summer clothes. I pealed a bathing suit, skirt, a pair of shorts, tank tops, and a pair of capris off before I got down to the pjs I put her in the night before. I was trying to be stern explaining that she needs to stay out of the clothes Mommy had already neatly organized while attempting to hold back uncontrollable laughter.

Today, I walked into her room to get her up from nap to find her standing at the foot of her bed wearing a headband in the 80s sweat band style, and her face glistening. I asked what was all over her face only to hear an answer I wasn’t prepared for. Apparently, she found the small tube of Vaseline we use at bedtime to heal her chronically dry lips and moisturized her face and hair with it. She pulled off all kinds of escape acts to reach her goal.

As I was leaving for class, Chris looked at me asking what else we could possibly do to ensure her safety and keep our sanity. Well, lets see buddy….I lost my sanity years ago so you do whatever you feel is necessary to keep her safe but don’t pretend to worry about my mental state.